Go. Now.

Just one more, I promise… and then you can go. How hard is it?
Just one last kiss…

Thank you.

You can move on now. I’m sure I’m already just a memory; a shadow in a shadowy past, aren’t I?

Now, go. Turn around and leave. Why are you still standing here? Do you want to see me cry? Do you want me get down on my knees and beg? Because I won’t… not yet. Not in front of you; not for those cold blue eyes to see…

I said, go! Clock’s ticking, there’s no time to waste.

There you go, way better.

Now keep walking… and just… don’t come back. I can live without you. You bet I can! I can live without your loving smile… without your touch in the cool morning air. I can live without the sweet smell of your skin. Sure I can.

I don’t need you at all… do I?

Why would I need the strength of your arms, pulling me closely to you and holding me tight in the darkest of December nights… Or your lips running up and down my body, coming together as one with mine? Why would I need them to wipe away my tears… when I can do it myself too…

Yes, baby, the tears. The ones that can’t stop rolling down my cheeks right now and the ones that… you’re not here to chase away… But that’s fine. Don’t worry. I'll do it for you...

You keep walking. Just go.

I’m sure I’m already a memory. But do me a favor…

... let me fade away. FOREVER.

Keep wishing

“Whenever on the beach, just close your eyes and make a wish… There I’ll be.”

And yet… it’s been years since we’ve been together; and yet it’s been years since I’ve felt you beside me. Six, to be precise. Six years on my own, wondering whether you still remember my name… Six years of tears and fears, and just… sheer loneliness.

And now… I have my eyes shut again… for you. It’s Aug. 5. Remember? Well, how could you forget? That was the day you promised me our very own love story will never end. We were sitting here on this beach, hand in hand… A couple made in heaven...

Weren’t we just the happiest…?

I remember… you running your fingers through my curls, kissing me gently beneath the silver rays of moonlight, trembling barely noticeable as I touched your face… I remember all of it... do you?

I catch myself crying again. When am I going to get over you and move on?
I don’t know.
It’s hard.

I look around and see nothing but the shadow of a palm tree nearby.

“… There I’ll be.”
But you’re not. I close my eyes again to see your face once more, if only for a moment… And then I open them to let myself be swallowed by the darkness one more time. Before I surrender, though, I cast a dreamy glance to the place we first met… just meters away…

And then a gasp fills my lungs... How could that really happen?

I wasn’t alone any more. A silhouette… a man, sitting in the dark of the night.
After all these years, could it really be... you?
And could it also be that we were spending every Aug. 5 together on the beach without realizing it?

Perhaps we’ll never know… but only if you could stop being so focused on the sea and turn to see me. You weren’t alone any more. I was there too. At your fingertips… pretty much.

I closed my eyes again.
“I wish I could be with you,” I thought.
“Right here and right now. Please, see me. Be with me… again, but this time forever!”
I could feel my tears fighting to break free again. I needed you like never before… now.

Nothing happened… at first, but then a deep voice came from somewhere on the side:
“Close your eyes and keep them shut. Are you making a wish? Good...
Because here I am."

Sealed deep within

My mind is blank. So blank I can’t let one single thought in. No, one I can. But it’s not really a thought, more of a memory really... 

I’m staring out over the sea to the high mountain peaks. Strangely pinkish they are, caressed by the gentle last rays of sunlight. I’m haunted by an idea… I feel like I need my time with you, alone. I turn to my left expecting to see you beside me, but all my eyes meet is empty space.

And I can swear I heard your voice just now…

I let my eyes pass over the landscape for a moment longer, but not more… I get up and head for the beach. It’s so peaceful at that time of day. It’s just me and the sea.

And you.

I turn again, instinctively, but for the second time my eyes seize nothing but thin air. I long for your smile, for your laugh… I long for your words.

And yet they’re gone. Far away.

I keep walking along the beach, leaving behind nothing but my footprints in the wet sand. The subtle north wind tousles my hair and whistles in my ear.

Sounds a lot like you. I’m tempted to turn again… and I do, only to be left disappointed… again.

I need you…

… need you like the countless fish need the sea, like the summer heat needs an unexpected cool rain…

I need you the way only I can need you…

A loud splash echoes to my right and then cold water pours over my feet. I shake my head and look around. The beach is empty – the way I found it when I first came…

And then… the world starts turning, faster than ever before. It swirls me into its hurricane of emotions…

I am spinning and spinning, and spinning until I feel like drowning deep within its secrets… Memory ends soon, I think to myself.

There are secrets that expect me to uncover them, but I refuse.

Not now.

Not without you…

… and not alone.

I prefer to simply wake up and wait. I have all the time in the world.

No… we do.