Diving into memories

This is my favorite time of day. The sun has long hid behind the mountains, the moon has taken its turn to lay its silver light on the never-ending fields.
We used to come here a lot. Megan and I, I mean. We were best friends. The best there could ever be …
And yet, I am lying all by myself on the grass, trying to capture the beauty of the night sky above me. There is the Big Bear and Orion … and there’s your star, Megan, right next to the nebula. The one that shines as bright as you once did … in all of our lives.

Megan was a dreamer, by the way. Did I mention that? … Yes, she believed in miracles, she believed in the impossible and you could see all this in her eyes. The hope, the strive to create a better world, to see it and be a part of its magic. She was thriving, she was flying without wings, if you will …

And then, out of the blue, she came up to me one day and said:
“Remember when I told you we’ll always be friends, no matter what?” She paused and smiled. “You know, I’ve always tried to convince people to believe in miracles, at least in their own little ones. I think faith will save the world one day … and I’m even more convinced in this now that … that … ”
“That … what, Megan?” I was worried.
It turned out: she was diagnosed with terminal cancer. Three months at the most. No therapy, no cure. It was as simple as that.

I was crushed. It was my best friend that they, doctors, were talking about. The girl who gave me strength when I was lost, hope when I most needed it. How could you ever say goodbye to a person like her … ever?

Megan did not change, though. She was as positive and optimistic as usual. She did not complain, not even once until her last moment. “Things happen for a reason,” she used to say. “It’s not our job to question fate … accept it and make the best out of what you get!” Honestly, I have no idea how she did all this. I was there for her every step of the way but it looked like she was the strong one, the one to convince everybody that things are going to be alright.

I never admitted it but I cried myself to sleep every single night for the next couple of weeks. Call me emotional, too weak or … just a real friend! All of them apply to me. I wish to think that I was the last one most out of the three but I don’t know … I am not the one to judge.

Our last months together weren’t more different than usual. We went out, had fun, giggled. The only problem was … Megan was … dying (God, I can’t believe I really said that!!!). She was getting weaker, not emotionally but physically. Her face was getting pale, she lost weight; she was not as energetic as before. But the look in her eyes did not change. It was bright and full of hope, full of the will to carry on living.

…

Megan passed away last Monday. We all knew it was coming. And yet, the pain was unbearable. Oh, Megan … why you?!
I don’t remember being so upset, ever before. I could not stop my tears roll down my cheeks … every one of them – a protest against the unfair fate of my best friend.

But enough said, enough cried! No more tears from now on … well, ok maybe on the inside just a little bit but it’s time to move on. Just like Megan did. She was strong for me all this time and I’m going to be strong for her … now!
The world is going to be a better place, Megan … trust me. If I don’t succeed in carrying on your good intentions, there are going to be people after me who definitely will.
How do I know? … I’m going to tell them your story. That’s how I know.
And why? Because … because, Megan … you were my best friend but most of all, you … you were a dreamer!